I had my interview on Monday and it went well, but a few of the questions got me thinking about things. Am I going with the right organization? Is this what God wanted me to do over there? Do they agree with everything I believe? These are things going through my mind right now with a bit more clarity this morning then last night. Last night I was just confused and in a bad state.
I read Psalm 32 this morning.
1 Blessed is the one
whose transgressions are forgiven,
whose sins are covered.
2 Blessed is the one
whose sin the LORD does not count against them
and in whose spirit is no deceit.
3 When I kept silent,
my bones wasted away
through my groaning all day long.
4 For day and night
your hand was heavy on me;
my strength was sapped
as in the heat of summer.[b]
5 Then I acknowledged my sin to you
and did not cover up my iniquity.
I said, “I will confess
my transgressions to the LORD.”
And you forgave
the guilt of my sin.
6 Therefore let all the faithful pray to you
while you may be found;
surely the rising of the mighty waters
will not reach them.
7 You are my hiding place;
you will protect me from trouble
and surround me with songs of deliverance.
8 I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go;
I will counsel you with my loving eye on you.
9 Do not be like the horse or the mule,
which have no understanding
but must be controlled by bit and bridle
or they will not come to you.
10 Many are the woes of the wicked,
but the LORD’s unfailing love
surrounds the one who trusts in him.
11 Rejoice in the LORD and be glad, you righteous;
sing, all you who are upright in heart!
Then I realized that I’d been trying to make my own plans. I know God called me to go to Africa. But I was the one that came up with the time line based on what AIM said. I was the one leading the way and not always waiting for answers on what I should do.
So, now I submit. God what do you want me to do? Who do you want me to go with? What do you want me to do when I’m over there? Lord, guide me through the process and help me not to take a step without seeking Your will. I know You have already planned out where I’m going, what I’m doing, when I will be there, how long I will be there… I know You’re already working in the hearts of the people I will work with as You are working in my heart. Lord, I trust in You. I give it all to You. Help me Lord. As Psalm 32:8 says, You will instruct me in the ways to go. Lord I thank You that You are a God who forgives. I thank You that You are a God who loves His children no matter what we do. And that You welcome us with open arms when we submit to Your will and ask for forgiveness. I thank You for who You are and I rejoice that I am Your daughter.
Please pray for me as I seek God’s will.